CARMEON HAMILTON

View Original

"If this isn't love..." Part II

Life was great! Couldn't get no greata! I had a boo...my very own boo...and I loved every minute of it.

We spent a lot of time together. I mean, every minute that we weren't in class, or he wasn't off with the football team, or I wasn't in an exec board meeting...we were together. And we loved it. That time was the soil in which we planted the seeds of our adoration for one another. In our minds, we were Will & Jada, Barack & Michelle, Peaches & Herb (LOL). Never had a man made me feel the way I did. But, don't get it twisted...let's dig a little deeper...

Recall that arrogant & brash man from the last post? Well, he was still around while we were playing how-does-your-garden-grow. Now, I sometimes consider myself to be a more than decent-looking young woman...tall, thin (but not need-a-sandwich thin), with an endearing face and smile. And back then, I have to admit...I had it going on! I was in college...and set up to graduate EARLY! I didn't have a "reputation" that preceded me. I maintained a certain level of class at all times. I was sweet and considerate. I was funny (most of the time without trying). I was domesticated. And I had all of my teeth!!! What more could a man ask for?!?!?!? Not much is all I can say.

Well, the boo didn't have any problems seeing all of my special qualities...he just never let ME know that he could see them!!! Can you believe that this man told me, "I don't put people on pedestals, just because they're pretty." Yes, read it again! He actually told me this after not even a week of knowing me! Ikr! My thoughts exactly! Well after getting over the shock of his statement, I could only think to myself, "I don't know what I've gotten myself into, but I have to stick around and see where this is going."

I'll tell you where it took me: It was World War III anytime I used the phrase "you're SUPPOSED to____." I was called "selfish" & "ungrateful" so many times, I lost count. I got put out of his apartment at 2:00 am (along with my dirty clothes). And this was all within the first 6 months!!! I know, I know...I can hear you already: "GUUURRLLL..." But I have to say, every bit of it, I needed to hear.

You see, I suffered from a syndrome that I like to call, BUT I'M THE GIRL IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, SO I'M SUPPOSED TO GET MY WAY Syndrome. I was prime real estate and was just won by the highest bidder. He should've been grateful that I even gave him the time of day! I wasn't the first female to be diagnosed with the BITGITRSISTGMW syndrome (and won't be the last, since most of us are still suffering from it). But, little did I know, I had just stumbled across the best thing since PANTS WITH POCKETS, and he knew it! He called me on all of my BS. None of the manipulation tactics in the female handbook worked! He didn't fall for the batting eyelashes or sudden affection. He didn't even fall for the sad eyes or tears. He made me face the fire and own my short-comings. And this is no easy feat. It's hard looking at yourself in the "get-real" mirror. I had to make a decision, that if I wanted this beautiful relationship to grow, then it was time to use some new fertilizer.



Come back for PART III tomorrow! It gets even better! I promise!